So the question has been asked me, by my dad, which apparently was a jeopardy question.
How many of each animal did moses take on the arc?
underline the section between the double quotes at the bottom to see the answer
My answer at the bottom in single quotes
A good book I was looking at again.
The Evolution Handbook
It's not what you may think though. It's actually a book systematically going through all the arguments for evolution, and disproving them. Quite convincingly at that.
Some things it goes through: the age of the earth, dating methods, DNA/ protein, fossils/ stratas, the flood, laws of nature. To me 10 pages of the tectonic section, really discredits evolution, but this book is 968 pages long!!!! One of the best books I've ever read, it made it so easy that you'll be asking "How in the world is there as many atheists and agnostics as there are?". There's tons of evidence in this book.
the evolution cruncher)
"None, it was noah that was on the arc"
'I guessed 7 pairs unclean, 2 pairs clean'
That would be the correct answer, if it had been Noah, that was in the question, duh me... hehe
31 May 2011
30 May 2011
Creekside
We went to creekside park, it was hot, 90 degrees. Caught some fish for now they'll be using the 55 gallon, the ammonia spike won't hit until a few more days. The mantid Snips is dying, nothing can be done. He's too weak to catch anything, but for now he can move, slightly. He'll be dead by tomarrow if not before then. That leaves Mystery, and Phoenix in container 1. I named the three in container 2
Hatchet- had a bent antenna, but it seems to have been severed where it was bent at around a 40 degree angle. hence the name hatchet.
Ideal- The ideal mantid, his antennas, legs, claws, and body are unblemished. No defects that I can see. Also he eats well.
Munch- He's container 2's equivalent of container 1's Phoenix. Eats a bunch, as much as his tiny body can handle. Ideal eats less, but still he fills out.
All the remaining Mantid's look good.
A picture of a swan at Creekside
I look soooo happy to be washing the plant substrate, which I mixed with the pond rocks, that were already in the tank ;) (I mixed them while they were inside the waterless tank).
I think it took around a hour and a half to finish setting it up from, when I began to wash the substrate. some of which was spent setting up this shot....
Some fishkeepers mind getting their hands/arms wet, which is kinda silly, if you keep fish you WILL get wet. Might as well get used to it. I don't mind it anymore, not even a nuisance to me. Actually when I need to get dry quickly I rolled down my sleeves, and rubbed them against my arms to dry them off. I'm a fishkeeper who actually enjoys getting his hands wet. The reasons for this are simple. First of all, using your hands is more precise, second, it's it's more flexible then any apparatus you can buy, and it's cheaper (unless you're keeping some fish which poses a danger to your hand, like a piranha). But, personally I've never gotten my hand injured by neon tetras :)
I almost forgot how calming of an effect the sound of running water has on me. *breaths deeply, exhales, saying ah, as one does with a calming effect*
Hatchet- had a bent antenna, but it seems to have been severed where it was bent at around a 40 degree angle. hence the name hatchet.
Ideal- The ideal mantid, his antennas, legs, claws, and body are unblemished. No defects that I can see. Also he eats well.
Munch- He's container 2's equivalent of container 1's Phoenix. Eats a bunch, as much as his tiny body can handle. Ideal eats less, but still he fills out.
All the remaining Mantid's look good.
A picture of a swan at Creekside
I look soooo happy to be washing the plant substrate, which I mixed with the pond rocks, that were already in the tank ;) (I mixed them while they were inside the waterless tank).
I think it took around a hour and a half to finish setting it up from, when I began to wash the substrate. some of which was spent setting up this shot....
Some fishkeepers mind getting their hands/arms wet, which is kinda silly, if you keep fish you WILL get wet. Might as well get used to it. I don't mind it anymore, not even a nuisance to me. Actually when I need to get dry quickly I rolled down my sleeves, and rubbed them against my arms to dry them off. I'm a fishkeeper who actually enjoys getting his hands wet. The reasons for this are simple. First of all, using your hands is more precise, second, it's it's more flexible then any apparatus you can buy, and it's cheaper (unless you're keeping some fish which poses a danger to your hand, like a piranha). But, personally I've never gotten my hand injured by neon tetras :)
I almost forgot how calming of an effect the sound of running water has on me. *breaths deeply, exhales, saying ah, as one does with a calming effect*
29 May 2011
Fish
well I finished set up the 55 gallon, the final parts of the gravel/substrate was added, as well the the heater, filter (bought a new one, same type as before), water parameter tester, thermometer, aquatic plants, and of course added water. Fiesta (aka shift) [fiesta was his original name which I forgot until I found him], and Shorte died. That leaves three alive in container 1: Pheonix, Mystery, and Snips. Pictures of set of aquarium to come soon. I should be able to get some fish after, the ammonia spike is over (The ammonia spike is part of the Nitrogen cycle. It occurs as part of the ecological maturation of the tank). Ammonia is the most toxic of the three, followed by a smaller Nitrite spike, which is less toxic, and ends with a small Nitrate spike, Nitrate has a real low toxicity to fish. I'd say at least by next weekend I should be able to get fish if not sooner.
In bible last week after watching "Lord save us from your followers" we were asked basically, if you had a gay friend would you go to wedding if it was to the same sex?
My answer: Yes.
I wouldn't go in support of their actions, but as their frined. I would tell them beforehand I don't agree with their choice in the marriage, but I would be coming because they're my friend. Remember Jesus was commonly seen with drunkards, and such people. He didn't hate them, no He loved them, but he didn't like some of the choices they made. We should love them, and dislike their actions, but they will be accountable to God for their actions. By hating them we could very easily cause them to turn away completely from God. God loves them, just as he loves us, and if he hates them, he would hate us all. But, thankfully he's a loving God.
In bible last week after watching "Lord save us from your followers" we were asked basically, if you had a gay friend would you go to wedding if it was to the same sex?
My answer: Yes.
I wouldn't go in support of their actions, but as their frined. I would tell them beforehand I don't agree with their choice in the marriage, but I would be coming because they're my friend. Remember Jesus was commonly seen with drunkards, and such people. He didn't hate them, no He loved them, but he didn't like some of the choices they made. We should love them, and dislike their actions, but they will be accountable to God for their actions. By hating them we could very easily cause them to turn away completely from God. God loves them, just as he loves us, and if he hates them, he would hate us all. But, thankfully he's a loving God.
28 May 2011
Adoption
My adoption story, as told by my dad
Note: I don't believe he said this but that's not my birth-mother's name...
And I think the odds of MPS "disappearing" are extremely under exaggerated, to say the least. The others are quite conservative as well. I just noticed, Penny's mentioned in there.
Note: I don't believe he said this but that's not my birth-mother's name...
And I think the odds of MPS "disappearing" are extremely under exaggerated, to say the least. The others are quite conservative as well. I just noticed, Penny's mentioned in there.
Darn it, and Highbanks
Well yesterday I caved to my habit. Held out for 17 days. Today I went to where I caved (my weak place), and I was given this idea. Why not try a point system? where every day is a point, while surviving my weak place is three. It could just be silly enough to work. I've heard somewhere if you can go 14 days without doing a habit, you can break it. But, I can't dwell on what I did then, for that's past, I can only focus on what I'm doing now. The effects of my cavature (not a word, I know) is easily irritated, much greater sarcasm, and basically just wanting what's best for me. These can last for a few days. It gradually tapers off though. I'm also going to stop listening to a specific song, because when I listened to it on youtube, there was stuff that went on I don't approve of. I think just knowing that combined with me listening to it, is slowly altering my morals. So to stop it, I must stop listening, which I'll do. Below is my point counter, and day counter, which I had just installed in this picture.
A picture from our trip to highbanks. This bridge was very, very high up. I dropped a stick, which took 1.85 seconds to hit the bottom, but may be skwed due to my reaction time. still it's most likely at least 60 feet down. I hate heights for those who don't know. I Absolutely hate heights!
This is an insect I found on the same bridge, a Midge perhaps? I don't know just a wild guess, my first guess would be a mayfly, but I think they're smaller...
I think it's called the Cole Earthworks, but I forgot... and Dad said I'd definetely forget in a couple months... How about in less then a day.
http://www.ohiohistorycentral.org/entry.php?rec=2417&nm=Highbanks-Park-Earthworks
This is a picture at home of an ant "farming" aphids. What happens is the ant prods the aphid with it's antennas eventually getting the aphid to excrete. The aphids excrete a sugary substance I believe. The ant's will protect the aphids, which so they both benefit from this relationship. Did you know that before an aphid is born it's already pregnant with it's own baby aphids. Aphids are mostly wingless females, but a winged one will be born if the plant is becoming crowded.Aphids come in a multitude of colors such as green, brown, and black. (fact that aphid has babies inside of it, before it's born, is unverified. It's just something I've heard.)
A picture of a clover. A clover which is flowering actually. I think the flowers of three leaved clovers are quite intriguing.
A picture of one mantid I had let go many days earlier.
The mantid I hadd called Mini is now Snips. I let go around 10 mantids that were in the second container, leaving 3 there. one was dead the rest were fine, but I was worried for their future, since there was so many. the ones that stayed, were just ones, that didn't come out after I shook the container over a plant. the other 5 in container 1 are all still alive. Those five are: Pheonix, Swift, Shorte, Snips, and Mystery.
This was a picture of the first Praying Mantis eggsack that hatched, which I took awhile ago. That mantis that appears to be coming out, actually, well... I don't think he made it... sadly he had apparently gotten stuck trying to molt out of it's first skin (when a Mantis hatches it actually has to get out of it's first skin which encloses them like an egg. That's how so many fit inside. I know if I try to help him, I'll kill him, by dismemberment... Trust me, I've tried it before... and that's what happened.
I don't think I've said this here, but quite a few people know this, I found my half-sister, Penny. This happened 5/23/11.
A picture from our trip to highbanks. This bridge was very, very high up. I dropped a stick, which took 1.85 seconds to hit the bottom, but may be skwed due to my reaction time. still it's most likely at least 60 feet down. I hate heights for those who don't know. I Absolutely hate heights!
This is an insect I found on the same bridge, a Midge perhaps? I don't know just a wild guess, my first guess would be a mayfly, but I think they're smaller...
I think it's called the Cole Earthworks, but I forgot... and Dad said I'd definetely forget in a couple months... How about in less then a day.
http://www.ohiohistorycentral.org/entry.php?rec=2417&nm=Highbanks-Park-Earthworks
This is a picture at home of an ant "farming" aphids. What happens is the ant prods the aphid with it's antennas eventually getting the aphid to excrete. The aphids excrete a sugary substance I believe. The ant's will protect the aphids, which so they both benefit from this relationship. Did you know that before an aphid is born it's already pregnant with it's own baby aphids. Aphids are mostly wingless females, but a winged one will be born if the plant is becoming crowded.Aphids come in a multitude of colors such as green, brown, and black. (fact that aphid has babies inside of it, before it's born, is unverified. It's just something I've heard.)
A picture of a clover. A clover which is flowering actually. I think the flowers of three leaved clovers are quite intriguing.
A picture of one mantid I had let go many days earlier.
The mantid I hadd called Mini is now Snips. I let go around 10 mantids that were in the second container, leaving 3 there. one was dead the rest were fine, but I was worried for their future, since there was so many. the ones that stayed, were just ones, that didn't come out after I shook the container over a plant. the other 5 in container 1 are all still alive. Those five are: Pheonix, Swift, Shorte, Snips, and Mystery.
This was a picture of the first Praying Mantis eggsack that hatched, which I took awhile ago. That mantis that appears to be coming out, actually, well... I don't think he made it... sadly he had apparently gotten stuck trying to molt out of it's first skin (when a Mantis hatches it actually has to get out of it's first skin which encloses them like an egg. That's how so many fit inside. I know if I try to help him, I'll kill him, by dismemberment... Trust me, I've tried it before... and that's what happened.
I don't think I've said this here, but quite a few people know this, I found my half-sister, Penny. This happened 5/23/11.
27 May 2011
Mantids 3
On Wednesday I discovered that the container that contains both eggsacks, had another hatching. Then I saw it... I saw the container was partially unzipped... with a decent ammount of mantids outside of it. I released the ones inside, and rounded up all the ones I could. I left 10 inside, fed them along with the last three!
6 out of those 8 are now dead (1st container) so I added two. yesterday I added another. So there's now a total of 5 alive in that container, with 6 dead. Out of the original 7, 5 died (the 8th one I added died sometime yesterday or later on Wednesday. Those 5 that remain look vary good. The three I added were ones I found outside on the wall of our garage. I even nicknamed those 5 (I had nicknamed the 8th one that died, sticki).
Shorte- Named such for the fact his antennas had both seem to been broken off to half of their normal length. [one of the two added wednesday]
Swift- A bundle of energy, moves much more then the others. Very energetic, but could be bad if he's ever short of food. [one of the two added wednesday]
Mini- both antennas are the same length as Shorte's shortest one (one of Shorte's is noticably shorter then the other) [the one added yesterday] (I may change his name)
Mystery- A strange little guy, on Tuesday (or was it Wednesday) he would catch a bug, but then released it, without eating it. I obserbed him do this at least 3 times. His sticky pads that extend past a mantid's claws seemed to me stuck up into his claw. But that's fixed now. So strange... one of the two of the original 7
Pheonix- a firery tempered Mantid. Only one other Mantid I ever had can rival his temperment. He caught one bug, after eating one, saw a bigger bug, caught it and "attempted" to eat it. The big bug was too much, and he became full and dropped it.
6 out of those 8 are now dead (1st container) so I added two. yesterday I added another. So there's now a total of 5 alive in that container, with 6 dead. Out of the original 7, 5 died (the 8th one I added died sometime yesterday or later on Wednesday. Those 5 that remain look vary good. The three I added were ones I found outside on the wall of our garage. I even nicknamed those 5 (I had nicknamed the 8th one that died, sticki).
Shorte- Named such for the fact his antennas had both seem to been broken off to half of their normal length. [one of the two added wednesday]
Swift- A bundle of energy, moves much more then the others. Very energetic, but could be bad if he's ever short of food. [one of the two added wednesday]
Mini- both antennas are the same length as Shorte's shortest one (one of Shorte's is noticably shorter then the other) [the one added yesterday] (I may change his name)
Mystery- A strange little guy, on Tuesday (or was it Wednesday) he would catch a bug, but then released it, without eating it. I obserbed him do this at least 3 times. His sticky pads that extend past a mantid's claws seemed to me stuck up into his claw. But that's fixed now. So strange... one of the two of the original 7
Pheonix- a firery tempered Mantid. Only one other Mantid I ever had can rival his temperment. He caught one bug, after eating one, saw a bigger bug, caught it and "attempted" to eat it. The big bug was too much, and he became full and dropped it.
23 May 2011
Mantids 2, other things.
Well it actually looks as if I might have been a bit optimistic, I can already see three mantids that will die within the day. They weren't able to catch any food for their first meal. Two of 8 (yes eight now, after discovering a single mantid in the other container where both eggsacks are now placed) look extremely good. If any survive I'd put my money on one of these two, specifically one of them, who after I put insects in caught one, ate it, caught one, then as he held that one caught another large one. He dropped the smaller one he was eating, though he didn't finish the large insect which was a bit more then he could eat at once.
Also thank you facebook. The reason why soon to come, once I'm sure, and have established communication.
Also thank you facebook. The reason why soon to come, once I'm sure, and have established communication.
22 May 2011
Mantids, blendon woods.
My dad and I went to blendon woods, which is less then 2 minutes from our house. We saw a guy down as well, and saw the firetruck from station 29 arriving as we left trying to find a path to walk. Hope the guy's ok. Firestation is actually closer to us then blendon woods is. Eventually we found a path.The first thing we saw was a this strange fungi
we walked awhile, just talking, and observing, and eventually made our way to this lake, where the closest you could get was shelters. On one of the windows I saw this spider, Nice and big webweaving spider.
There was a bank on the far side, and a few geese were sitting there. In the shelters they have some viewing telescopes. I used one of these to look at one of the geese, then put my camera up to it, and ta-da, we have a picture. It tuned out a lot better then it would've had I tried zoom with my camera instead.
This is a picture of a clearing we came across, when we were coming back. We apparently missed it on the way there. It was starting to getting cloudier outside.
A day I had been long waiting for arrived! The day the first mantis' hatched. This is one mantid on my finger, this was one of seven I kept. Sadly I'm guessing arounf 3 won't make it to their first molt. This is just from my experience with them in general. I don't even know if one will survive until adulthood. It's not an easy task to raise them all the way to adulthood.
This is a rainbow. God's sign that never again will the earth be flooded, like in the great flood.
we walked awhile, just talking, and observing, and eventually made our way to this lake, where the closest you could get was shelters. On one of the windows I saw this spider, Nice and big webweaving spider.
There was a bank on the far side, and a few geese were sitting there. In the shelters they have some viewing telescopes. I used one of these to look at one of the geese, then put my camera up to it, and ta-da, we have a picture. It tuned out a lot better then it would've had I tried zoom with my camera instead.
This is a picture of a clearing we came across, when we were coming back. We apparently missed it on the way there. It was starting to getting cloudier outside.
A day I had been long waiting for arrived! The day the first mantis' hatched. This is one mantid on my finger, this was one of seven I kept. Sadly I'm guessing arounf 3 won't make it to their first molt. This is just from my experience with them in general. I don't even know if one will survive until adulthood. It's not an easy task to raise them all the way to adulthood.
This is a rainbow. God's sign that never again will the earth be flooded, like in the great flood.
21 May 2011
got me
Well my parents got me, I didn't see the surprise birthday party coming, until my dad told me.
Very nice though. I also got a camera a Olympus FE-47. When we go on a vacation, this will come in extremely handy, plus now my dad can have his camera back ;). Also I got an xbox 360 kinect. I will definetly be using that. I didn't want to go unwrap present, because I don't particularly like doing that in front of other people. I was also playing on one of the arcade games in the community center (the same one I stayed up all night in around a week ago). Christian, my cousin, decided it'd be fun to force me to come by turning it off while I was in the middle of playing......
...not funny...
...ok maybe it was for her
though I did surprise her later by sneaking up and saying "boo" a few times. hee hee. She had a great reaction :P and squealed a little bit. She should've known I get her back somehow, for turning off the game, even though if I had been in her position, I would've done the exact same thing... :D
I did surprise her earlier like that as well, but she did smack me in the back of the head for it. Heh, I deserved it lol. It's all in good fun though.
Very nice though. I also got a camera a Olympus FE-47. When we go on a vacation, this will come in extremely handy, plus now my dad can have his camera back ;). Also I got an xbox 360 kinect. I will definetly be using that. I didn't want to go unwrap present, because I don't particularly like doing that in front of other people. I was also playing on one of the arcade games in the community center (the same one I stayed up all night in around a week ago). Christian, my cousin, decided it'd be fun to force me to come by turning it off while I was in the middle of playing......
...not funny...
...ok maybe it was for her
though I did surprise her later by sneaking up and saying "boo" a few times. hee hee. She had a great reaction :P and squealed a little bit. She should've known I get her back somehow, for turning off the game, even though if I had been in her position, I would've done the exact same thing... :D
I did surprise her earlier like that as well, but she did smack me in the back of the head for it. Heh, I deserved it lol. It's all in good fun though.
20 May 2011
Vaction?
I asked my dad a few days ago if we could go somewhere. He put up Chicago as a possibility *shudders*, Chicago's a big city, so no thank you. So I made a possibility centered around, a place I think someone should visit in their life...
Niagra Falls. Another place that's close to Niagra Falls also caught my attention, Letchworth state park. It looked really neat, and with nature everywhere. a place not too far away from that looked like another place to possibly visit, Mendon Ponds Park. It was the wetlands that caught me there, I'm still looking around that area though. This vacation would likely take place soon after school lets out. If this actually plays out, I see it as Niagra falls first, visit to Mendon Ponds Park on the way to Letchworth state park. This is only the first possibility I came up with, but I just stated looking, there could be so many more parks I haven't looked at.
might be more of a longshot though...
-Chris
Niagra Falls. Another place that's close to Niagra Falls also caught my attention, Letchworth state park. It looked really neat, and with nature everywhere. a place not too far away from that looked like another place to possibly visit, Mendon Ponds Park. It was the wetlands that caught me there, I'm still looking around that area though. This vacation would likely take place soon after school lets out. If this actually plays out, I see it as Niagra falls first, visit to Mendon Ponds Park on the way to Letchworth state park. This is only the first possibility I came up with, but I just stated looking, there could be so many more parks I haven't looked at.
might be more of a longshot though...
-Chris
Chess
ELO rank
Tanx- 1393 ruber-1359
(rank before match)
Tanx||Ruber
==========
d2d4 d7d5
c2c4 g8f6
c4d5 f6d5
e2e3 b8c6
f1d3 e7e5
d4e5 c6e5
d3b5 c7c6
b5d3 c8e6
e3e4 d5b4
d3e2 f8d6
a2a3 b4a6
g1f3 e5f3
e2f3 d8e7
o-o o-o-o
f1e1 d6h2
g1h2 d8d1
e1d1 e7h4
h2g1 a6c5
b1d2 c5d3
g2g3 h4e7
d2f1 e7c5
d1d3 e6c4
d3c3 c5b5
c1f4 h7h6
f3g4 c8d8
a1d1 d8e7
f4d6 e7f6
e4e5 f6g5
f1e3 c4e2
d6e7 f7f6
f2f4 g5g6
g4f5 g6f7
d1d7 b5b2
e7d6 f7e8
e5e6 b2c3
f5g6
time remaining: Tanx-4:15 out of 10:00 ruber-1:23 out of 10:00
oh Fiona, I was listening to your music you made the whole time, it helped me win (and get some determination) So, thanks for helping me ;).
It was a great game on his part. Practice is the only thing that can improve you at chess, and looking at a player's mistakes, and learning from them.
I lost two matches later though, quite badly if I do say so myself.
Tanx- 1393 ruber-1359
(rank before match)
Tanx||Ruber
==========
d2d4 d7d5
c2c4 g8f6
c4d5 f6d5
e2e3 b8c6
f1d3 e7e5
d4e5 c6e5
d3b5 c7c6
b5d3 c8e6
e3e4 d5b4
d3e2 f8d6
a2a3 b4a6
g1f3 e5f3
e2f3 d8e7
o-o o-o-o
f1e1 d6h2
g1h2 d8d1
e1d1 e7h4
h2g1 a6c5
b1d2 c5d3
g2g3 h4e7
d2f1 e7c5
d1d3 e6c4
d3c3 c5b5
c1f4 h7h6
f3g4 c8d8
a1d1 d8e7
f4d6 e7f6
e4e5 f6g5
f1e3 c4e2
d6e7 f7f6
f2f4 g5g6
g4f5 g6f7
d1d7 b5b2
e7d6 f7e8
e5e6 b2c3
f5g6
time remaining: Tanx-4:15 out of 10:00 ruber-1:23 out of 10:00
oh Fiona, I was listening to your music you made the whole time, it helped me win (and get some determination) So, thanks for helping me ;).
It was a great game on his part. Practice is the only thing that can improve you at chess, and looking at a player's mistakes, and learning from them.
I lost two matches later though, quite badly if I do say so myself.
Here I stand
I wrote a poem awhile back called "here I stand", I may have lost it so I wrote this in school. I like one quite a bit, I think it's my best.
Here I Stand
MPS is a disease
you cannot appease
it never goes away
'till the day
you're under a mound
in the ground
and that day
wasn't far away
12 was the age
the doctor's waged
and agreed
that I'd be
When I'd see
my last day
and pass away
without a say
It wouldn't be kept at bay
and I couldn't get away
some people frayed
and went away
but others prayed
so live I may
and here I'd stay
Then one day
it went away
never to be seen
again in me
it went away
with God's say
by his Grace
and through his might
there's no trace
in my life
I survived
By His hand
'cause I shouldn't be alive
yet here I stand.
It's a poem about my case of MPS, which disappeared due to God's handiwork
Here I Stand
MPS is a disease
you cannot appease
it never goes away
'till the day
you're under a mound
in the ground
and that day
wasn't far away
12 was the age
the doctor's waged
and agreed
that I'd be
When I'd see
my last day
and pass away
without a say
It wouldn't be kept at bay
and I couldn't get away
some people frayed
and went away
but others prayed
so live I may
and here I'd stay
Then one day
it went away
never to be seen
again in me
it went away
with God's say
by his Grace
and through his might
there's no trace
in my life
I survived
By His hand
'cause I shouldn't be alive
yet here I stand.
It's a poem about my case of MPS, which disappeared due to God's handiwork
19 May 2011
best friend
Wrote this in school today.
Found!
it's been, much too long
and it felt, very wrong
But I, found a way
on my, special day
You've never been, far away
from my heart, anyways
I guess I didn't call, 'cause I was shy
and I wish, I would've tried
Seven years, is too long
And it's felt, very wrong
Kyle, I've missed you so
How much, you'll never know
What I'd wished, though so small
was to contact, you at all
In all the years, that went by
you never had, left my mind
I had longed, to contact you
so much so, it weighed on me
but now, I feel free
from the things, that plagued me
But finally, you've been found
and with joy, I'm abound
I'm as happy, as can be
with a smile, that spans the sea
and on my special day too!
Best birthday present ever!!!!
Honorable mention goes to fiona with the bzflag "screenshot"
Found!
it's been, much too long
and it felt, very wrong
But I, found a way
on my, special day
You've never been, far away
from my heart, anyways
I guess I didn't call, 'cause I was shy
and I wish, I would've tried
Seven years, is too long
And it's felt, very wrong
Kyle, I've missed you so
How much, you'll never know
What I'd wished, though so small
was to contact, you at all
In all the years, that went by
you never had, left my mind
I had longed, to contact you
so much so, it weighed on me
but now, I feel free
from the things, that plagued me
But finally, you've been found
and with joy, I'm abound
I'm as happy, as can be
with a smile, that spans the sea
and on my special day too!
Best birthday present ever!!!!
Honorable mention goes to fiona with the bzflag "screenshot"
18 May 2011
lost bestfriend
I just found out he's on facebook. That's the only reason I'm joining it. I want to communicate with him again. I've just been too shy to do it by phone.
lost bestfriend
I haven't had contact with him in far too long (6 years I'm guessing). His family since last fall (my parents). But after a talk with my parents, I realized Rosemary Shannon is my best bet to find out about Penny. I was able to dig up some things, including their address.
wintermere Florida (it's a suburb of orlando, much like westerville is of columbus)
If I talk to rose, I'm talking to Kyle. He is my best friend after all. And if I talk to him what's stopping me from calling anyone else I know far away.
Let's see what happens. Maybe it's time I'm back in their lives, why was I too shy to call you Kyle I'll never know. I won't lose you a third time.
the anxiety is already getting to me, and it's only been five minutes! This is my foster mother for goodness sakes, they're like family! and kyle, stacy, and Chrissy are all like brothers, and sisters to me.
wintermere Florida (it's a suburb of orlando, much like westerville is of columbus)
If I talk to rose, I'm talking to Kyle. He is my best friend after all. And if I talk to him what's stopping me from calling anyone else I know far away.
Let's see what happens. Maybe it's time I'm back in their lives, why was I too shy to call you Kyle I'll never know. I won't lose you a third time.
the anxiety is already getting to me, and it's only been five minutes! This is my foster mother for goodness sakes, they're like family! and kyle, stacy, and Chrissy are all like brothers, and sisters to me.
birth siblings
I wrote this in school today.
My Half-sister
Oh Penny where are you
I wish to find you soon
You've disappeared with the wind
and I don't know where you are
I just hope it's not too far
I need to know you're alright
and not stuck in the night
so I'll look with all my might
'till you're in my sight
We are related after all
I wish to find you someday
No matter how far away
I couldn't search, to my dismay
but I can, as of today
you're my sister after all
that is what, I want to do
And I hope to find you soon
Wherever you've gone, Penny Sue
also to my knowledge I have a half brother, who would be around 2 years younger then I am. Penny is two years older then I am. all of us went into adoption.
My Half-sister
Oh Penny where are you
I wish to find you soon
You've disappeared with the wind
and I don't know where you are
I just hope it's not too far
I need to know you're alright
and not stuck in the night
so I'll look with all my might
'till you're in my sight
We are related after all
I wish to find you someday
No matter how far away
I couldn't search, to my dismay
but I can, as of today
you're my sister after all
that is what, I want to do
And I hope to find you soon
Wherever you've gone, Penny Sue
also to my knowledge I have a half brother, who would be around 2 years younger then I am. Penny is two years older then I am. all of us went into adoption.
17 May 2011
one more day
my adoption story, as told by my foster mom
Her adopted son, Kyle, would become my best friend. Too bad they moved away seven years ago. He's the only one who really understood me.
Her adopted son, Kyle, would become my best friend. Too bad they moved away seven years ago. He's the only one who really understood me.
16 May 2011
bzflag
I was informed yesterday, that it appears that 3.0 is abandoned, but the devs are now working on another version (2.4 I believe) I looked at sourceforge, and the devs are on a roll.
come to speak of bzflag, it just seemed dull the last two days...
6 days now... I can't let my gaurd down. he's waiting, he wants me to fall in again. I won the battle, but the war's just begun. I Can't lose... not now.
I was trapped with no end in sight
it had me in it's grasp
with no hope to fight it.
for I was in my weakest place
and beginning to be overwhelmed
and this was something that I would not face
and so I gave it up to God
and soon I made it through
filled with him I knew what to do
I went after It's symbol
For an hour I was being torn inside
I thank the Lord, that he got me through
For I was able to accomplish my goal
The symbol is now gone.
Destroyed in the place where I was weakest
It will never be the same.
But I still have a long way to go
I feel a change long overdue, I feel much different then I did. I'm on fire. There comes a time when we all are faced with a situation like mine, and we have to choose between God, and him. I chose God, and did not falter. Hope, is what I have once again.
But my biggest fear is that some may not forgive me for what I've done, which is why I'm very reluctant to share what I did, or the fact I did something at all. Plus, I'm not friends with many people, not closely at least. (less then 5). And the only one I would completely trust I haven't seen in over 7 years! Because of my lack of friends I don't want to lose them, or be judged... But nothing was worse then the guilt, and shame I have towards myself. It doesn't help when you kept thinking about your struggle with this constantly for over a year. It's gradually worn me down. It's why I'm so energetic, and happy now.
Cheers, Chris
come to speak of bzflag, it just seemed dull the last two days...
6 days now... I can't let my gaurd down. he's waiting, he wants me to fall in again. I won the battle, but the war's just begun. I Can't lose... not now.
I was trapped with no end in sight
it had me in it's grasp
with no hope to fight it.
for I was in my weakest place
and beginning to be overwhelmed
and this was something that I would not face
and so I gave it up to God
and soon I made it through
filled with him I knew what to do
I went after It's symbol
For an hour I was being torn inside
I thank the Lord, that he got me through
For I was able to accomplish my goal
The symbol is now gone.
Destroyed in the place where I was weakest
It will never be the same.
But I still have a long way to go
I feel a change long overdue, I feel much different then I did. I'm on fire. There comes a time when we all are faced with a situation like mine, and we have to choose between God, and him. I chose God, and did not falter. Hope, is what I have once again.
But my biggest fear is that some may not forgive me for what I've done, which is why I'm very reluctant to share what I did, or the fact I did something at all. Plus, I'm not friends with many people, not closely at least. (less then 5). And the only one I would completely trust I haven't seen in over 7 years! Because of my lack of friends I don't want to lose them, or be judged... But nothing was worse then the guilt, and shame I have towards myself. It doesn't help when you kept thinking about your struggle with this constantly for over a year. It's gradually worn me down. It's why I'm so energetic, and happy now.
Cheers, Chris
15 May 2011
Pets
Here's pictures of pets
Not pictured: Smokey
Age: 16
Status: Deseased
Cause: Kidney failure
Date of death: Friday of the week of September 11 2001
Notes: He was the first cat that I lost, the only one we lost before we lived where we are currently living, which we moved to when I was 10 (in June of that year, so it was 2003). I think we got him because while the construction of the house we used to live in, his mother was gaurding them, and I'm not sure what happened, but someone shot her I think, and so my parents took smokey, and I believe some others took his siblings in. He and I had our difficulties, but he tolerated me. My parents where especially displeased with me when I cut his whiskers off, when I was 6 years old. (if not 6 then very young). I didn't know any better, I just thought, and I remember basically thinking "his whiskers look very long, and look like they need cut... ... I should cut them". I never did that again, after my parents told me why I shouldn't/ why they didn't need to be cut. heh oops on my part, that's for sure :)
Name: Cinnamon
Age: 17-19
Status: Deceased
Cause: Kidney failure
Date of death: September 2005
Notes: She was my favorite cat, even though she only stayed in the basement. A loving cat, who loved everyone. I My parents got her, after seeing smokey looking lonely, but I don't know what the date was. She was strong to the end, not showing her bad state, until one day I found her behind the box she slept in, wandering behind it in a circle, not apprearing to know. We took her to the vet, but the next day she was gone. it hit me a bit hard when she died. But, another cat has taken the role of being my favorite, and maybe even more so in some regards.
Name: Jewlie
Age: Approx. 6
Statues: Deceased
Cause: Euthanized
Date of death: Sept. 2007 perhaps? 2008?
Notes: My mom encountered jewlie when she was unloading grocery bags from her car, and jewlie stuck here head under my mom's arm. Later after 2 weeks we adopted her. We had her for 2 years. She was the only doh we ever had, and I think my prejudiced thinking of dogs came out, in the form of non appriciation. This I would learn two years later in september. Jewlie broke her leg, and the vet found that she had bone cancer spread all throughout her body. weighing the options, and great lack of chances of surgical success combined with the outcome, we had her euthonize. She was in a great ammount of pain due to the broken leg/ cancer. She had to be carried into our car on her bed, when we originally took her to the vet. I shed some tears due to the fact I realized I hadn't appriciated the time with her, and knew I couldn't get it back. I felt shame at myself, but wuth Cinnamon, I did shed more tears, but I knew I had relatively appriciated my time with her.
This is hope, age 9. We got her a little after tiger. We didn't actually plan to get a cat with tiger. We were visiting lake hope, and one of my parents was putting something in the dumpster, and saw hope, we took her with us when we left. That's why she's named hope. Spayed, and frequently needs medication for the cat equivalent of the sniffles.
This is our cat tiger. at least 9 years old. We got him a little after the week of Sep. 11 2001.
His tail is a little strange, I think I remember something about his tail, possibly being ran over, or something when He was young. (before we got him). Recently suffered seizures in which he appeared conscious throughout. He's on some anti-seizure medication. He's a bit of a chuncky cat, but I don't think he weighs the most. I believe you can telll why he's named tiger. ;)
Neutered, and picked out by my parents.
This is Sneaky, he's around 16 years old. My parents got heim a few months after adopting me, which took a year and half but that's a story for a different time. My mom took, me and planned on getting a goldfish, and came home with Sneaky. He's a pretty big goldfish if I do say so myself ;)
He's thinning I believe, which is most likely a sign of a progression of kidney disease.
The oldest cat we have right now. he's neutered as well.
This Patch, age 5-6. We got him after my mom's knee surgery. We actually waited in a park, until cat welfare opened, and then we went to get a cat. Going was my dad's idea, I'm guessing. Patch was the only cat I picked out, but my parent named him. He's my favorite cat. He frequently sits in the chair next to me when I'm using the computer, which he's doing right now. *Chris looks at the chair*. Right now he appears to be resting. He's very loyal as my dad says which is very unusual for a cat. I actually switched sleeping spot over the course of a year before, and he would sleep on the bed I was, for a bit (not sure how long he stayed after I fell asleep). Possibly weighs the most, due to his muscular build. He's the dominant cat in our house. *chris leans back and pets patch after drinking some chocolate milk* Neutered. I also call him patchy, and "ps-ps" when I call him (like pst, but without a t at the end).
This is Mai, approx. 5 years old. We got them in September '05. We were just going to get her "Ms. Bigeyes, as she looked then, but then we saw her brother, who was about to be seperated from his last sibling, Mai. So, I said something, and ended up getting him, socks as well. Picked out by my parent/named by them. She was named after the US woman soccer player Mai Hamm, due to her appearance playing with ping pong balls, knocking it back and forth. Spayed, and doesn't like me.
Socks, Mai's brother, around 5 years old. Named/basically picked by my parents. Quite shy, and skiddish avoiding any floor but the basement. He is very difficult to find when he's not in his usually (openly known) location. When I was looking to take his picture he wasn't there, so I was going back upstairs after failing to find him (I quickly looked after we wasn't in one of these locations), and I just saw him sitting behind this object. Neutered, and named socks because sneakers was already taken.
I know one thing...
I have a soft spot for little kittens.
As a side note I'm beginning to read a book called "Join the Club" by Tina Rosenberg
I'm not sure of her religious views though. I think the book was released in March of this year.
It's about how the use of peer pressure can change the world, and break bad habits, even those habits people know are self-desructive, but still won't stop. Which they don't stop, no matter how much information they have.
Not pictured: Smokey
Age: 16
Status: Deseased
Cause: Kidney failure
Date of death: Friday of the week of September 11 2001
Notes: He was the first cat that I lost, the only one we lost before we lived where we are currently living, which we moved to when I was 10 (in June of that year, so it was 2003). I think we got him because while the construction of the house we used to live in, his mother was gaurding them, and I'm not sure what happened, but someone shot her I think, and so my parents took smokey, and I believe some others took his siblings in. He and I had our difficulties, but he tolerated me. My parents where especially displeased with me when I cut his whiskers off, when I was 6 years old. (if not 6 then very young). I didn't know any better, I just thought, and I remember basically thinking "his whiskers look very long, and look like they need cut... ... I should cut them". I never did that again, after my parents told me why I shouldn't/ why they didn't need to be cut. heh oops on my part, that's for sure :)
Name: Cinnamon
Age: 17-19
Status: Deceased
Cause: Kidney failure
Date of death: September 2005
Notes: She was my favorite cat, even though she only stayed in the basement. A loving cat, who loved everyone. I My parents got her, after seeing smokey looking lonely, but I don't know what the date was. She was strong to the end, not showing her bad state, until one day I found her behind the box she slept in, wandering behind it in a circle, not apprearing to know. We took her to the vet, but the next day she was gone. it hit me a bit hard when she died. But, another cat has taken the role of being my favorite, and maybe even more so in some regards.
Name: Jewlie
Age: Approx. 6
Statues: Deceased
Cause: Euthanized
Date of death: Sept. 2007 perhaps? 2008?
Notes: My mom encountered jewlie when she was unloading grocery bags from her car, and jewlie stuck here head under my mom's arm. Later after 2 weeks we adopted her. We had her for 2 years. She was the only doh we ever had, and I think my prejudiced thinking of dogs came out, in the form of non appriciation. This I would learn two years later in september. Jewlie broke her leg, and the vet found that she had bone cancer spread all throughout her body. weighing the options, and great lack of chances of surgical success combined with the outcome, we had her euthonize. She was in a great ammount of pain due to the broken leg/ cancer. She had to be carried into our car on her bed, when we originally took her to the vet. I shed some tears due to the fact I realized I hadn't appriciated the time with her, and knew I couldn't get it back. I felt shame at myself, but wuth Cinnamon, I did shed more tears, but I knew I had relatively appriciated my time with her.
This is hope, age 9. We got her a little after tiger. We didn't actually plan to get a cat with tiger. We were visiting lake hope, and one of my parents was putting something in the dumpster, and saw hope, we took her with us when we left. That's why she's named hope. Spayed, and frequently needs medication for the cat equivalent of the sniffles.
This is our cat tiger. at least 9 years old. We got him a little after the week of Sep. 11 2001.
His tail is a little strange, I think I remember something about his tail, possibly being ran over, or something when He was young. (before we got him). Recently suffered seizures in which he appeared conscious throughout. He's on some anti-seizure medication. He's a bit of a chuncky cat, but I don't think he weighs the most. I believe you can telll why he's named tiger. ;)
Neutered, and picked out by my parents.
This is Sneaky, he's around 16 years old. My parents got heim a few months after adopting me, which took a year and half but that's a story for a different time. My mom took, me and planned on getting a goldfish, and came home with Sneaky. He's a pretty big goldfish if I do say so myself ;)
He's thinning I believe, which is most likely a sign of a progression of kidney disease.
The oldest cat we have right now. he's neutered as well.
This Patch, age 5-6. We got him after my mom's knee surgery. We actually waited in a park, until cat welfare opened, and then we went to get a cat. Going was my dad's idea, I'm guessing. Patch was the only cat I picked out, but my parent named him. He's my favorite cat. He frequently sits in the chair next to me when I'm using the computer, which he's doing right now. *Chris looks at the chair*. Right now he appears to be resting. He's very loyal as my dad says which is very unusual for a cat. I actually switched sleeping spot over the course of a year before, and he would sleep on the bed I was, for a bit (not sure how long he stayed after I fell asleep). Possibly weighs the most, due to his muscular build. He's the dominant cat in our house. *chris leans back and pets patch after drinking some chocolate milk* Neutered. I also call him patchy, and "ps-ps" when I call him (like pst, but without a t at the end).
This is Mai, approx. 5 years old. We got them in September '05. We were just going to get her "Ms. Bigeyes, as she looked then, but then we saw her brother, who was about to be seperated from his last sibling, Mai. So, I said something, and ended up getting him, socks as well. Picked out by my parent/named by them. She was named after the US woman soccer player Mai Hamm, due to her appearance playing with ping pong balls, knocking it back and forth. Spayed, and doesn't like me.
Socks, Mai's brother, around 5 years old. Named/basically picked by my parents. Quite shy, and skiddish avoiding any floor but the basement. He is very difficult to find when he's not in his usually (openly known) location. When I was looking to take his picture he wasn't there, so I was going back upstairs after failing to find him (I quickly looked after we wasn't in one of these locations), and I just saw him sitting behind this object. Neutered, and named socks because sneakers was already taken.
I know one thing...
I have a soft spot for little kittens.
As a side note I'm beginning to read a book called "Join the Club" by Tina Rosenberg
I'm not sure of her religious views though. I think the book was released in March of this year.
It's about how the use of peer pressure can change the world, and break bad habits, even those habits people know are self-desructive, but still won't stop. Which they don't stop, no matter how much information they have.
14 May 2011
interests
Here's some things I like to do:
================================
-Chess (It's fun) there's a chess website I used called chess hotel
as Tanx
------------------
Games played 296
Won games 121
Lost games 171
Draws 4
Rank 1302
-------------------
Tanx is the username I started under, I got progressively better and then I made Chrile, so Tanx includes my learning process games, while chrile has less of those.
and my second username chrile
------------------
Games played 95
Won games 49
Lost games 44
Draws 2
Rank 1515
------------------
you start with a elo rank of 1200
chrile's is high because I play against players who have a higher elo then I do. so if I lose, I'll lose less points, but if I win I'll gain more, but the opponents will be more difficult
I personal enjoy chess, since it makes you think. Chess Hotel is an online chess game against other players, It's the best chess site I know of.
-puzzles (every once in awhile, I like the 3d ones more)
-cards (euchre, hearts, spades [those type of card games])
-origami (even put some in my grandma, and grandpa's caskets at their funerals, my way of saying goodbye)
-thinking (I like thinking out loud as well)
-figuring out how things work (I killed a computer once... my dad was not too happy about that *chris rubs the back of his neck, while smiling sheepishly*
=================================
I also kinda like the website http://www.sporcle.com/
It's a site with quizzes relating to science, math, geography, ect.
While my dad gets into the sports teams, I know how they do, but for the most part I never really watch them, much. I've sometimes wondered how much better the world would be if most people (those that do get into the sports teams) would cut the time they watch them in half.
The thing I really wish would be cut out of sports are those "fantasy teams", now that's a bad waste of time, and relatively pointless. I may watch say 4-8 complete football games a year (that includes college football as well). That's basically all I watch, somewhat with intrest. I really admired Ohio state football coach Jim tressel, but after the violations I'm not sure what to think. Before that I admired the Christian example he set.
I also know I don't particularly like the downtown city, way too many people, and cars, and hardly any nature at all. I love nature, his creation is so much better then whatever we try to replace it with. That's why I love Lake hope, you have your family, and nature, and the tv, but we only used that at night, the rest of the time we were outside the cabin, enjoying nature. I loved every minute of it. I also enjoyed the car ride there, watching the land go by. Spring, and fall are the best times to go.
I could also see myself in the distant future living somewhere surrounded by nature... Now that would be great.
on a completely separate note I think Spring is the best season.
and even more random... I wonder when my praying mantises will hatch. I love them, they're so neat. Though raising one from nymph to adulthood can be tiresome. It can be difficult to get food for the little ones. I remember when I used to go into thorns to search for the eggsacks, that was fun... I still don't know what in the world possessed me to dress in a tank-top and shorts one year when I went to search for them. I always made sure I left at least four. This terrain was perfect for them so I could always count on many surviving to adulthood. I can't do this anymore due to the fact that this terrain was turned into storage... it made me sad, and a bit upset when I learned that a few years back, now I have to order them. This could be my last year raising them for awhile, and the last two years I've failed to raise one to adulthood. But, last year the mantid just failed his final molt, which was quite frustrating, but it happens. I've seen my share of funny praying mantis' though. I also got one to mate one time, and the male didn't get turned into lunch for the female. fortunately for him. I also got one to last until Christmas one year. It died the next day though.
as a side note: my eyes are continuing to lose their focus, and it's getting a bit annoying, and it's only 3:41 PM...
================================
-Chess (It's fun) there's a chess website I used called chess hotel
as Tanx
------------------
Games played 296
Won games 121
Lost games 171
Draws 4
Rank 1302
-------------------
Tanx is the username I started under, I got progressively better and then I made Chrile, so Tanx includes my learning process games, while chrile has less of those.
and my second username chrile
------------------
Games played 95
Won games 49
Lost games 44
Draws 2
Rank 1515
------------------
you start with a elo rank of 1200
chrile's is high because I play against players who have a higher elo then I do. so if I lose, I'll lose less points, but if I win I'll gain more, but the opponents will be more difficult
I personal enjoy chess, since it makes you think. Chess Hotel is an online chess game against other players, It's the best chess site I know of.
-puzzles (every once in awhile, I like the 3d ones more)
-cards (euchre, hearts, spades [those type of card games])
-origami (even put some in my grandma, and grandpa's caskets at their funerals, my way of saying goodbye)
-thinking (I like thinking out loud as well)
-figuring out how things work (I killed a computer once... my dad was not too happy about that *chris rubs the back of his neck, while smiling sheepishly*
=================================
I also kinda like the website http://www.sporcle.com/
It's a site with quizzes relating to science, math, geography, ect.
While my dad gets into the sports teams, I know how they do, but for the most part I never really watch them, much. I've sometimes wondered how much better the world would be if most people (those that do get into the sports teams) would cut the time they watch them in half.
The thing I really wish would be cut out of sports are those "fantasy teams", now that's a bad waste of time, and relatively pointless. I may watch say 4-8 complete football games a year (that includes college football as well). That's basically all I watch, somewhat with intrest. I really admired Ohio state football coach Jim tressel, but after the violations I'm not sure what to think. Before that I admired the Christian example he set.
I also know I don't particularly like the downtown city, way too many people, and cars, and hardly any nature at all. I love nature, his creation is so much better then whatever we try to replace it with. That's why I love Lake hope, you have your family, and nature, and the tv, but we only used that at night, the rest of the time we were outside the cabin, enjoying nature. I loved every minute of it. I also enjoyed the car ride there, watching the land go by. Spring, and fall are the best times to go.
I could also see myself in the distant future living somewhere surrounded by nature... Now that would be great.
on a completely separate note I think Spring is the best season.
and even more random... I wonder when my praying mantises will hatch. I love them, they're so neat. Though raising one from nymph to adulthood can be tiresome. It can be difficult to get food for the little ones. I remember when I used to go into thorns to search for the eggsacks, that was fun... I still don't know what in the world possessed me to dress in a tank-top and shorts one year when I went to search for them. I always made sure I left at least four. This terrain was perfect for them so I could always count on many surviving to adulthood. I can't do this anymore due to the fact that this terrain was turned into storage... it made me sad, and a bit upset when I learned that a few years back, now I have to order them. This could be my last year raising them for awhile, and the last two years I've failed to raise one to adulthood. But, last year the mantid just failed his final molt, which was quite frustrating, but it happens. I've seen my share of funny praying mantis' though. I also got one to mate one time, and the male didn't get turned into lunch for the female. fortunately for him. I also got one to last until Christmas one year. It died the next day though.
as a side note: my eyes are continuing to lose their focus, and it's getting a bit annoying, and it's only 3:41 PM...
May 13 A day I'll cherish
I'm not exactly ready to discuss what exactly happened from after I got a haircut until I played bzflag that night. I'll just say that I finally did what was right. Something I struggled with for over 2 years, and was easily trapped in. I survived my weakness, where I most commonly fall to it, and Thank The lord, I was able to destroy a huge part of it. If you knew what it was you wouldn't think it was that big, until you realize what I destroyed was it's physical symbol to me personally. It took one whole hour to destroy, and I even used that weak place to destroy it's symbol. It was the most grueling hour I've ever experienced. If I had not been praying/ reciting Eph. 6:10-13 I would have easily fallen when I was in my weak place. I've never been tempted like I was in that hour span, and there's no way I could survive it without God. I had to basically cry out to him much of the time, It's obvious to me the evil one was extremely determined to keep me trapped. Even though it's yet to be seen whether I can continue to resist it, it feels like this gigantic weight is gone, and even now I can still feel the holy spirit. I did what God told me to do, no matter what "he" used to try and stop me, including people, my want to just stop and play bzflag, doubt, the reason I fell for this to begin with, shame, and everything imaginable he didn't budge me. He can't trump the fact I was doing this because God wanted me to. Without this baggage (symbol) it's like it's gone, which makes it easier to resist, but I need to be aware that this could get me in trouble.
Eph 6:10-13 is a verse I actually just memorized on May 13 for bible (which I had to write May 13th as well. I procrastinated :)
here it is from memory, which should be very accurate after repeating so many times yesterday
"be strong in the Lord and his mighty power. Put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the ruler, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after everything has been done, to stand"
This verse was perfect for what I went though in my time in the desert.(the event above.)
It made the Afterparty, so much more enjoyable, knowing that with God I had taken a Giant leap toward being Free! It was great! One of the best days of the year. I hope this was the end of it, the end of my biggest obstacle in my life so far. I hate what I did, but it's done, I can't change it, I have to move on, otherwise I could fall back to where I was.
Why am I writing this? Actually I don't feel comfortable writing this, but I think by finally telling someone, I can get over it, it's a step toward freedom, telling someone can relieve a lot from the soul. I feel it's right. and I feel like I did yesterday after I destoryed it, just by writing this. Plus what chance do I have when I'm the only one that knows this is a huge problem in my life (my parents know a little but I don't think they realize how bad it really is). So basically No One knows it's as bad as I'm writing here. Maybe that's a reason why I kept getting stuck. No accounatbility. I feel relieved, and it almost doesn't even feel like I've been up all night, because of this. I still feel tired though. lol Thank God
- Chris
Eph 6:10-13 is a verse I actually just memorized on May 13 for bible (which I had to write May 13th as well. I procrastinated :)
here it is from memory, which should be very accurate after repeating so many times yesterday
"be strong in the Lord and his mighty power. Put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the ruler, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after everything has been done, to stand"
This verse was perfect for what I went though in my time in the desert.(the event above.)
It made the Afterparty, so much more enjoyable, knowing that with God I had taken a Giant leap toward being Free! It was great! One of the best days of the year. I hope this was the end of it, the end of my biggest obstacle in my life so far. I hate what I did, but it's done, I can't change it, I have to move on, otherwise I could fall back to where I was.
Why am I writing this? Actually I don't feel comfortable writing this, but I think by finally telling someone, I can get over it, it's a step toward freedom, telling someone can relieve a lot from the soul. I feel it's right. and I feel like I did yesterday after I destoryed it, just by writing this. Plus what chance do I have when I'm the only one that knows this is a huge problem in my life (my parents know a little but I don't think they realize how bad it really is). So basically No One knows it's as bad as I'm writing here. Maybe that's a reason why I kept getting stuck. No accounatbility. I feel relieved, and it almost doesn't even feel like I've been up all night, because of this. I still feel tired though. lol Thank God
- Chris
13 May 2011
Crazy day, and various pictures
It always seems that the day before a friday the thirteenth is a bit crazy, and this one was no exception. Blogger was in read only mode for awhile, but it's fixed now. Don't forget the fact that yesterday (May 12) it was 90 degrees outside in Westerville OH. It was a fantastic day, as well as the two days before. Today it's also quite nice out, nice and sunny.
Three days before yesterday, I heard the first hummingbird (their calls are very unique).
After and yesterday I finally got one...
...in a picture of course.
Their heartbeats resemble whirling air. When I went to lake hope one year (lake hope was Ohio's first state park) it's in the middle of no where, surrounded by woods everywhere. A great place to go to when you want to leave the city behind. The lodge there was the main attraction until it burned down, one downside of being in the middle of nowhere. Now I think the biggest thing is the nature lodge. I like it for the fact it has hummingbird feeders everywhere (like 4-6 of them), and there's quite a bit of hummingbirds. Also at select times they fill these vials with sugarwater, give them to you, and it's time to do the statue! (just came up with that, it's not actually called that, but it should be.) The point of this, is to stand still so that the hummingbirds will come and drink out of the vials that you are holding. But that's was just the beginning of a great day I had there one year. It just so happened a hummingbird tagger was at lake hope to tag the hummingbirds. It was the first time one had come to lake hope. After capturing/tagging them he let us get close and even held the hummingbird up to our ear, so that we could hear the heartbeat. It was cool (it was much better then that, but no words can accurately describe how much I loved this experience). Also at one point, he pointed out the fact that one of the hummingbirds he held was actually a female, who, you may have guessed it, was ready to lay her eggs. Also the nature lodge has antlions around it's walls. Ever since this experience we've had a hummingbird feeder.
I first came across this flower last year, but at first I didn't think much of it. Until it produced it's fruit, which I had never seen before. I'll get a picture as soon as the fruit comes out.
I came across a ant colony, which explains why the log next to it, has been dissappearing on one side. The ant's basically placed dirt nuggets on the end of it. If I was younger I would've basically dug into it, hopefully searching for the queen, but now... no... I don't think it's right even though some people would argue it's just an insect. It's not hurting anyone's property so it's not right, but that's my opinion.
An ant that was struggling with this dying beatle. The last I saw, it left it there.
a portrait of me. I think I erased the area around the right eye too many times, hence the strange appearence of it. I only drew the head, and top of the shoulders because I can't draw the folds in clothing very well, as well as the arms/legs. I seem to do well with the eyes/nose if given enough time, the lips usually take the time I need to do both the eyes, and nose combined. This took at least two hours, plus some touching up. I kept trying to fix the right eye, so it kinda got dark, and looked strange after awhile, I think this was caused by my pencil started to go through some of the paper, which is supported by the fact on the back I can see the right eye. Kinda like it's engraved. Maybe I should try to redo it.
as a side note I'm going to an afterparty (the party after our school's junior-senior banquet, which I am NOT going to). Personally I don't like social gatherings, and I'm guessing I wouldn't normally go to the afterparty, except for the fact it's at the community center of the church I go to (Vineyard Columbus).
I never really liked social gatherings too much. More of a loner if you will, and I don't tend to share too much personally with those I don't trust. It's just how I am. So I'll be there from 11:00 PM to 7:00 AM. I'm not planning to go to sleep
Also my portrait made me realize that I desperately need a haircut, which I'll be getting before I go. I plan to dominate the air hockey table. I'm pretty good at it in my opinion. I've been dying to try something out. (air hockey and L @ hide and seeks hills, can they be compared? most likely no. Just ask most people who play at hide and seek hills.
Three days before yesterday, I heard the first hummingbird (their calls are very unique).
After and yesterday I finally got one...
...in a picture of course.
Their heartbeats resemble whirling air. When I went to lake hope one year (lake hope was Ohio's first state park) it's in the middle of no where, surrounded by woods everywhere. A great place to go to when you want to leave the city behind. The lodge there was the main attraction until it burned down, one downside of being in the middle of nowhere. Now I think the biggest thing is the nature lodge. I like it for the fact it has hummingbird feeders everywhere (like 4-6 of them), and there's quite a bit of hummingbirds. Also at select times they fill these vials with sugarwater, give them to you, and it's time to do the statue! (just came up with that, it's not actually called that, but it should be.) The point of this, is to stand still so that the hummingbirds will come and drink out of the vials that you are holding. But that's was just the beginning of a great day I had there one year. It just so happened a hummingbird tagger was at lake hope to tag the hummingbirds. It was the first time one had come to lake hope. After capturing/tagging them he let us get close and even held the hummingbird up to our ear, so that we could hear the heartbeat. It was cool (it was much better then that, but no words can accurately describe how much I loved this experience). Also at one point, he pointed out the fact that one of the hummingbirds he held was actually a female, who, you may have guessed it, was ready to lay her eggs. Also the nature lodge has antlions around it's walls. Ever since this experience we've had a hummingbird feeder.
I first came across this flower last year, but at first I didn't think much of it. Until it produced it's fruit, which I had never seen before. I'll get a picture as soon as the fruit comes out.
I came across a ant colony, which explains why the log next to it, has been dissappearing on one side. The ant's basically placed dirt nuggets on the end of it. If I was younger I would've basically dug into it, hopefully searching for the queen, but now... no... I don't think it's right even though some people would argue it's just an insect. It's not hurting anyone's property so it's not right, but that's my opinion.
An ant that was struggling with this dying beatle. The last I saw, it left it there.
a portrait of me. I think I erased the area around the right eye too many times, hence the strange appearence of it. I only drew the head, and top of the shoulders because I can't draw the folds in clothing very well, as well as the arms/legs. I seem to do well with the eyes/nose if given enough time, the lips usually take the time I need to do both the eyes, and nose combined. This took at least two hours, plus some touching up. I kept trying to fix the right eye, so it kinda got dark, and looked strange after awhile, I think this was caused by my pencil started to go through some of the paper, which is supported by the fact on the back I can see the right eye. Kinda like it's engraved. Maybe I should try to redo it.
as a side note I'm going to an afterparty (the party after our school's junior-senior banquet, which I am NOT going to). Personally I don't like social gatherings, and I'm guessing I wouldn't normally go to the afterparty, except for the fact it's at the community center of the church I go to (Vineyard Columbus).
I never really liked social gatherings too much. More of a loner if you will, and I don't tend to share too much personally with those I don't trust. It's just how I am. So I'll be there from 11:00 PM to 7:00 AM. I'm not planning to go to sleep
Also my portrait made me realize that I desperately need a haircut, which I'll be getting before I go. I plan to dominate the air hockey table. I'm pretty good at it in my opinion. I've been dying to try something out. (air hockey and L @ hide and seeks hills, can they be compared? most likely no. Just ask most people who play at hide and seek hills.
10 May 2011
ivys, spiders, and art
Would you like to touch this plant?
Well I sure wouldn't. Why you may ask... But I for one don't particularly want to be touching poisen ivy. Poisen ivy can grow as a vine, a climbing vine, or even as a bush! Poison ivy flowers around May or June. After flowering it produces berries. It also has two cousins: poison oak with 5 leaves, and poison sumac with 7 leaves.
This is a wolf spider. You may guess from it's name it's an agile, and quick spider. These assumptions prove to be true. At this time of the year, they are the most common spider, and largest. This won't continue for very long, only until the web spinning spiders are able to catch up in size.
This is a lego guy I drew less then 9 weeks ago. It looked nice, except for the torso, which is a little disproportional.
as a side note May 15 is when a *special edition* of overkill the beginning is planned. I could in all likelyhood release it before, but it's because of may 15. see if you can guess why. Here's some hints.
1. it involves the color purple
2. it's specific to that date
3. it involves a disease I "had".
also the first week of october is mental illness awareness week. Of the ones I'm quite "familiar" with include bi polar, and adhd. To me bi polar is far more troublesome than adhd is. The colors for bi-polar are white/black. These colors symbolize the mania state and the depressive state. These states are basically opposites. The both have their downsides. Even though being happy is a good thing, it's also bad whether you know it or not. Your judgement will suffer plus you're full of yourself in the mania state (up state). I'm guessing it's kinda like being high, but since I've never been high (nor do I want to) I wouldn't know. I myself get treated for adhd with Vyvanse. It's kinda strange that they treat adhd with a stimulent. Isn't strange that, that works for people with adhd :P.
Well I sure wouldn't. Why you may ask... But I for one don't particularly want to be touching poisen ivy. Poisen ivy can grow as a vine, a climbing vine, or even as a bush! Poison ivy flowers around May or June. After flowering it produces berries. It also has two cousins: poison oak with 5 leaves, and poison sumac with 7 leaves.
This is a wolf spider. You may guess from it's name it's an agile, and quick spider. These assumptions prove to be true. At this time of the year, they are the most common spider, and largest. This won't continue for very long, only until the web spinning spiders are able to catch up in size.
This is a lego guy I drew less then 9 weeks ago. It looked nice, except for the torso, which is a little disproportional.
as a side note May 15 is when a *special edition* of overkill the beginning is planned. I could in all likelyhood release it before, but it's because of may 15. see if you can guess why. Here's some hints.
1. it involves the color purple
2. it's specific to that date
3. it involves a disease I "had".
also the first week of october is mental illness awareness week. Of the ones I'm quite "familiar" with include bi polar, and adhd. To me bi polar is far more troublesome than adhd is. The colors for bi-polar are white/black. These colors symbolize the mania state and the depressive state. These states are basically opposites. The both have their downsides. Even though being happy is a good thing, it's also bad whether you know it or not. Your judgement will suffer plus you're full of yourself in the mania state (up state). I'm guessing it's kinda like being high, but since I've never been high (nor do I want to) I wouldn't know. I myself get treated for adhd with Vyvanse. It's kinda strange that they treat adhd with a stimulent. Isn't strange that, that works for people with adhd :P.
09 May 2011
Mother's day, and the feather
Since this was my mother's first mothers day without her mother, it was difficult to her to say the least. So I put something together for her to help her out. First I went outside gathered flowers, and put them together in a vase. That was the easy part of this. The second one is two plates filled with flower heads, mainly violets, and some orange flowers, that looked nice (I have no idea what they are though). This was a great use of a couple hours, I mean who can argue that putting a smile on your mother's face isn't worth that. This was so much better then any card. Today she apparently called a donut a "Glorious donut" or something like that. She's happy, and that alone is enough for me. What's better then helping your parents, especially your own mother, when she's having a tough time.
This next object is a mosaic I made at around the end of the school year last year (around June 2010). I think you can guess what it is. It was the last piece of art I made that my grandma made. I remember the last words she said to me as well (summer 2010). "oh, you're such a dear". She was giving me a hug at the time, and then walked out. a week later she was gone. my mom offered to take me to see her in the hospital, but I said I could go tomorrow. How wrong I was, for she was gone when I woke up. I realized a few weeks later that if I had gone, in all likelyhood my mom wouldn't have gotten to stay with her mother as long as she did, for if I had been there we would have left hours earlier. I take comfort in the fact that she got to see her mother, and I don't mind. Would I have liked to see her? of course I would have! I loved her. When I think of how I should act I think of her. She was a great role model. But I realize it was/is more important for my mom to get to see her, then for me, I'm happier knowing that.
Sadly this feather, is all that remains of a fight. A fight in which a pigeon lost. A cat was able to get a pigeon eating birdseed. my dad tried to chase it away. It worked temporarily. But the bird being injured, only made it off of our poarch before the cat got it around the neck. My dad tried to chase the cat, in the hopes it would drop the bird. The cat, with the pigeon in it's mouth, took off. The cat got away, with the bird, it's safe to assume the bird didn't get away.
poor bird.
This next object is a mosaic I made at around the end of the school year last year (around June 2010). I think you can guess what it is. It was the last piece of art I made that my grandma made. I remember the last words she said to me as well (summer 2010). "oh, you're such a dear". She was giving me a hug at the time, and then walked out. a week later she was gone. my mom offered to take me to see her in the hospital, but I said I could go tomorrow. How wrong I was, for she was gone when I woke up. I realized a few weeks later that if I had gone, in all likelyhood my mom wouldn't have gotten to stay with her mother as long as she did, for if I had been there we would have left hours earlier. I take comfort in the fact that she got to see her mother, and I don't mind. Would I have liked to see her? of course I would have! I loved her. When I think of how I should act I think of her. She was a great role model. But I realize it was/is more important for my mom to get to see her, then for me, I'm happier knowing that.
Sadly this feather, is all that remains of a fight. A fight in which a pigeon lost. A cat was able to get a pigeon eating birdseed. my dad tried to chase it away. It worked temporarily. But the bird being injured, only made it off of our poarch before the cat got it around the neck. My dad tried to chase the cat, in the hopes it would drop the bird. The cat, with the pigeon in it's mouth, took off. The cat got away, with the bird, it's safe to assume the bird didn't get away.
poor bird.
06 May 2011
Overkill the beginning continued
I stayed home from school today. Apparently my allergies combined with the air pressure was to blame. In the meantime I went on a coding spree, and completed most of Overkill the beginning, I'm not sure what to think, I like it, yet some things I don't. I completed 3 buildings, and one ITARO (Inwardly Twisting Arc Ring Object), I also completed most of a fourth building. Only the first floor of that building remains. After I complete that I only need to finish one more! Unless of course I want to construct the secret building. It just depends on whether I need to fill some space or not ;)
The map will be a FFA btw.
This map including some objects from tank galore, and sidewinder is over 10000 lines long! It's my longest map yet.
Not too long ago ( around 15 minutes ago) I finally flushed out all the errors from the building below. The top screenie was from yesterday as well, and below it what that building now looks like. I have a private server up and running if anyone wants to see. I'll tell you where it is. :)
*yawns* It's 12:20 AM EDT here. Time for this guy to go get some shuteye.
The map will be a FFA btw.
This map including some objects from tank galore, and sidewinder is over 10000 lines long! It's my longest map yet.
Not too long ago ( around 15 minutes ago) I finally flushed out all the errors from the building below. The top screenie was from yesterday as well, and below it what that building now looks like. I have a private server up and running if anyone wants to see. I'll tell you where it is. :)
*yawns* It's 12:20 AM EDT here. Time for this guy to go get some shuteye.
05 May 2011
Overkill the beginning
Overkill the beginning is shaping up quite well. I have most of the map designed, and more than half of the area is filled. but the remain parts are either buildings, or densely populated with pyramids. I personally like this map quite a bit.
this can also be found on the bzflag forums in the map previews section.
It has been entirely hand edited, no modeler, or map editor was used in the creation of this map.
On another note that has nothing to do with this, I wonder when my praying mantis' will hatch.
I thank those navy SEALS who went, risked their own lives to get Osama Bin Laden. We should not celebrate the fact he died, but we should be happy that the fact the threat he posed to us has been eliminated. The enviroment someone grows up in never determines their character. Look at one of Osama's sons. Despite the fact he was raised by Osama he turned out an advocate for peace. The worrisome part is that al-Qaeda's new face will want to prove himself/distinguish himself in some way. That is what we need to watch out for. Many people in the middle-east can rest more easily now. It feels like we've final ended the chapter on 9/11, a lot of familys who lost loved ones will be resting much more easily now. It sure hasn't felt like 10 years.
this can also be found on the bzflag forums in the map previews section.
It has been entirely hand edited, no modeler, or map editor was used in the creation of this map.
On another note that has nothing to do with this, I wonder when my praying mantis' will hatch.
I thank those navy SEALS who went, risked their own lives to get Osama Bin Laden. We should not celebrate the fact he died, but we should be happy that the fact the threat he posed to us has been eliminated. The enviroment someone grows up in never determines their character. Look at one of Osama's sons. Despite the fact he was raised by Osama he turned out an advocate for peace. The worrisome part is that al-Qaeda's new face will want to prove himself/distinguish himself in some way. That is what we need to watch out for. Many people in the middle-east can rest more easily now. It feels like we've final ended the chapter on 9/11, a lot of familys who lost loved ones will be resting much more easily now. It sure hasn't felt like 10 years.
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